DISCLAIMER: Because many people have been asking me, to my face or behind my back, I want to make it abundantly clear that I was not sexually abused (to my knowledge) in this lifetime. My reasons for writing this book do not stem from that place. I say this to "clear" my family (or people in my life) from having a חשש (accusation, concern or doubt) placed on them. But it is bidavka (specifically) because I am not a "survivor" that it is important I am writing this book, so that survivors know that it is not just people who have gone through it who care. Others, too, care very much.

A quick search on sexual abuse in the frum community returns an abundance of organizations, resources, books, and podcasts—each produced by courageous trailblazers, many of them survivors who put the community's need for transparency before their own privacy. It has largely all been said and we have come along way. But, we have a long way to go still. 

This book I am composing isn't about saying something new for the first time. It's about doing something that hasn't been done.

Black Shadows: A Prism on Sexual Abuse in the Frum Community consolidates the voices, perspectives, and expertise of great community leaders and brave survivors into one comprehensive space. But it's much more than a resource library. Like a prism, turning this topic even slightly reveals entirely different dimensions—hidden layers and far-reaching impacts most people have never considered. This isn't a linear subject. Its complexities are infinite, quietly shaping lives in ways we rarely recognize. The goal of this book is not just education, but a genuinely expanded awareness of its true scope—like it has never been brought together before.

After extensive research, no single book covers the many different rays of this prism. This one will.

Borrowing terms from geometry: every opinion in this book is a right angle, but together they form a polyhedron. Every person interviewed shares a common denominator—and a completely different angle.

I have been interviewing, for months now, a list of highly credentialed individuals, each representing a distinct standpoint on this topic. And of course, survivors. Every participant, leader and survivor alike, is interviewed by me, then handed their chapter for approval before publication. Each will sign a consent form before publication.

Leaders (pioneers) will appear by name and credentials, with one opening quote from their interview.

Survivors will appear under pseudonyms with changed details (if they so choose).

This book will include many voices, each standing on different points of the religious spectrum. Even if they don't agree with one another in certain arenas, they will come together for the sake of the mission and the book's greater goal.

Regarding financing, writing this book means stepping away from regular income—a real financial risk with no guaranteed timeline. I'm moving forward anyway, and I'm asking for support. I am having the audacity to ask for your faith and help to make this book come to fruition. I will be devoting my potential 'work time' hours to the making of this book, and although I don't know how long it will take, I predict it will be about a year, but probably more. That being said, all monthly sponsorships will terminate as soon as I finish the project.

• Donations can be given directly on this page (not tax deductible). Monthly contributions are preferred over lump sums. If you want a tax-deductible receipt, I have a recognized organization (that aligns with this mission) that can give you one. Be in touch with me. I am also able to give receipts, but they are not tax deductible.
• Organizational partnerships/collaborations with full co-recognition are welcomed. I am in search of organizations (that have funding) that would want to collaborate on this initiative, with obvious recognition of the partnership.
• Sponsorships/Dedications are available (with dedications published at the front of the book or even on the cover). Sponsorship levels are written below.
• Grants: I am a grant writer, and I am writing LOIs to a list of foundations that are interested in this topic. Again, I have an organization (that aligns with this mission) that can give a foundation an official receipt.

All donations and sponsorships can be submitted on this IsraelGives page, but you will not receive a tax-deductible receipt. If you want a tax-deductible receipt, do not give on this site, and please be in touch with me at blackshadowsbook@gmail.com. Please do not send me BIT or Paybox.

As I embark on this journey, which has no practical logic attached to it in regard to my stage in life and certainly does not provide financial security backing, I approach it with a נעשה ונשמע attitude. I am doing, and everything else will have to fall into place later.

I ask Hashem to guide me through this process with sensitivity, patience, clarity, humility, empathy, סייעתא דשמיא, השגחה פרטית, and guts. Please Hashem, give me the tools, the capacity, the tact, the strength, and the stamina to walk through this with one goal in mind: bringing together many voices on this topic in order to bring more sensitivity in our communities. As I take my very first steps, please Hashem, hold my hand and help me navigate this difficult topic with Your help and guidance. Help the words that end up on paper accurately reflect the voices of the people sharing their perspectives and stories.

One note on the name: Black Shadows was a name that just came to me. The Hebrew word for shadow—צל—carries a gematria of 120, echoing the blessing עד מאה ועשרים: may you live a full life. That is the hope behind every page of this book. Every single person deserves a full, happy life.

Please read my blog that I wrote before Yom Kippur about the book: https://blogs.timesofisrael.com/maybe-charity-lessens-the-degree-of-the-decree/

And here is another blog about one piece of the journey I am on in regard to this book: https://blogs.timesofisrael.com/eating-around-the-bruises-a-mikvah-story/

Re Haskamot:

The book will carry haskamot from reputable members of the broader Jewish community because that is the only way to get the intended target audience to read the book. I know who I want to read the book, and if I interview certain people and self-publish, the people I want to reach simply won't read it. The people who need to read this book are the same people who require a 'hechsher' on it. So I am "forced" to "work within the system" in order to reach my intended specific target audience. It's a bit of a catch-22, and it took me a while to conclude that I have to go about this not in my preferred way in order to ensure that the book lands in the hands I want it to.